Show, Don't Tell: Descriptive Writing Mastered
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Show, Don't Tell: Descriptive Writing Mastered
Year 7 English Creative Writing Skills Bringing Stories to Life
What's the Difference?
Version A: 'The dog was scary.' Version B: 'The massive German Shepherd bared its yellowed fangs, its deep growl rumbling from its throat like distant thunder. Saliva dripped from its black lips as its amber eyes locked onto mine with predatory intensity.'
The Golden Rule: Show, Don't Tell
Instead of stating facts, paint pictures with words Use sensory details (sight, sound, smell, touch, taste) Let readers experience the story through vivid descriptions Create emotional connections through specific details
Tell vs Show Examples
{"left":"TELL: She was angry\nTELL: The room was messy\nTELL: He was nervous\nTELL: The food was delicious","right":"SHOW: Her face flushed crimson as she clenched her fists, her voice rising to a sharp crescendo\nSHOW: Clothes spilled from overflowing drawers like fabric waterfalls, while empty pizza boxes created a cardboard skyline across the floor\nSHOW: His palms grew slick with sweat as he shifted from foot to foot, his heart hammering against his ribs\nSHOW: The rich chocolate melted on my tongue, releasing hints of vanilla and caramel that made my eyes flutter closed in pure bliss"}
The Five Senses Toolkit
SIGHT: Colors, shapes, movements, facial expressions SOUND: Dialogue, background noise, silence, rhythm SMELL: Fresh, stale, sweet, sharp, familiar scents TOUCH: Texture, temperature, pressure, weight TASTE: Sweet, sour, bitter, salty, combinations
Sense-ational Practice
Choose one object from your bag or desk Write 5 sentences describing it using ALL five senses Be specific and creative Share your best sentence with the class
Power Words and Strong Verbs
Replace weak verbs: 'walked' → 'strutted, shuffled, marched' Use specific adjectives: 'big' → 'towering, massive, gigantic' Choose precise nouns: 'car' → 'sedan, convertible, SUV' Add emotional weight: 'said' → 'whispered, declared, stammered'
Professional Inspiration
'The best writing is rewriting.' - E.B. White 'Show the readers everything, tell them nothing.' - Ernest Hemingway
Transform This Scene
Original: 'It was a dark and stormy night. John was scared as he walked to the house.' Your task: Rewrite this in 3-4 sentences using show, don't tell Include at least 3 different senses Make the reader feel John's fear
Your Descriptive Writing Checklist
✓ Used specific, vivid details instead of general statements ✓ Included multiple senses in descriptions ✓ Chose strong verbs and precise adjectives ✓ Created emotional connections through imagery ✓ Let readers experience the scene, not just read about it