Working It Out Together

Overview

In this third lesson of Caring Friends Together, children explore how friends can solve a problem when they both want the same resource. Through a story, role-play and cooperative play, children practise sharing, taking turns, listening, choosing together and trying a kinder choice after a mistake.

Learning intentions

• We are learning to notice when a friend has a problem or feels left out.
• We are learning to use kind words, listening and turn-taking to solve disagreements.
• We are learning to work together and make a choice that is fair.
• We are learning that mistakes are part of learning and we can try again.

Success criteria

• I can listen to what another person wants.
• I can use kind words such as “Can I have a turn when you finish?” or “Let’s share.”
• I can take turns, share or choose together.
• I can try a better choice if something does not work.

Curriculum links

• Health and Physical Education — Relationships: Boundaries and staying safe; practising sharing, taking turns and solving disagreements in positive ways.
• Health and Physical Education — Relationships: Self and others; recognising that friendships can include feeling left out, upset or unsure how to show care.
• Te Whāriki — Contribution / Mana tangata: participating with others, taking turns and including people.
• Te Whāriki — Belonging / Mana whenua and Wellbeing / Mana atua: strengthening relationships and feeling safe, valued and able to contribute.
• Key competencies: relating to others, managing self, and participating and contributing.

Lesson structure (60 minutes)

1. 0–10 min · Read and notice. Teacher gathers children in a circle and reads a familiar picture book, pausing at a simple friendship problem such as two children wanting the same block, puppet or paintbrush. Open with the story hook and friendship problem slide and ask, “How might each child be feeling?” and “What could they do so both children are okay?” Students look closely, share ideas with a partner and identify kind or unhelpful choices. Accept verbal, gesture, drawing or home-language responses.

2. 10–25 min · Role-play the problem. Teacher models the problem with a child or puppet: both characters reach for the same resource. First show an unhelpful response briefly, then pause and invite children to suggest a different choice. Use the problem-solving choices slides to show simple options: take turns, share, choose another resource, ask for help, or choose together. Students work in groups of three—two actors and one observer—then rotate roles. Each group practises one scenario using the sentence starters: “Can I have a turn?” “Let’s share.” “What do you think?” and “Let’s choose together.”

3. 25–45 min · Cooperative challenge. Teacher places children in five groups of three and explains that the goal is to create or complete something together, not to be the fastest. Offer a choice of a cooperative building challenge, such as making a bridge or animal home with shared blocks, or a movement challenge, such as moving three soft objects from one hoop to another while taking turns. Display the cooperative challenge instructions and remind children to listen, include every person and use resources safely. Students plan briefly, complete the challenge and practise sharing materials, taking turns and making group decisions. Teacher observes and prompts with, “Whose idea have we heard?” and “How can everyone have a turn?”

4. 45–55 min · Talk about what helped. Teacher brings the groups together and revisits the discussion and Aroha–Whanaungatanga–Akoranga slides. Ask, “What helped your group succeed?” “How did you show aroha?” “How did whanaungatanga help you work as a team?” and “What did you learn when something went wrong?” Students share one helpful action they noticed, such as listening, waiting, asking kindly, encouraging someone or changing a plan. Model acknowledging a mistake: “I grabbed the block. I’m sorry. I will ask and wait for my turn.”

5. 55–60 min · Reflect and farewell. Teacher distributes the draw-and-talk friendship reflection sheet and gives quiet thinking time. Students draw or dictate one way to work something out together and may complete the sentence, “Next time I can…”. Invite two or three children to share, then close with a group statement: “We can care, listen and try again.”

Resources

• Familiar picture book featuring a simple friendship disagreement
• Soft toy or puppets for modelling
• Building blocks, recycled construction materials or loose parts
• Hoops, cones and three soft objects per movement group
• Five group spaces for three children
• Working It Out Together visual teaching deck
• draw-and-talk friendship reflection sheet
• Whiteboard or large paper and marker
• Calm space for children who need a brief break

Assessment

• During reading and role-play, listen for children identifying feelings, suggesting a fair solution and using kind words or gestures.
• During the cooperative challenge, observe whether children can take turns, share resources, listen to another idea and include all group members. Note children who need adult support to wait, communicate or re-enter play.
• Use the reflection drawing and children’s explanations as an exit check. Record whether each child can name or demonstrate one helpful strategy and one way to try again after a mistake.

Differentiation

• Provide puppets, gesture choices and picture cues for children who are developing oral language; accept pointing, drawing, home-language responses or communication devices.
• Keep groups to three and assign flexible roles—actor, helper and observer—so children can participate without needing to speak first.
• Rehearse one sentence starter at a time and model physically what “wait”, “share” and “ask kindly” look like.
• Support children with sensory or self-regulation needs by offering a quieter role, reducing materials, previewing the routine and providing a calm space. Avoid using real personal conflicts as scenarios; children may opt out of acting and use puppets instead.
• Extend confident children by asking them to combine two solutions, explain why a choice is fair, or help the group notice and repair an unhelpful choice.