Peer Review Guidelines
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Peer Review Guidelines
Read the draft
THE LAST FERRY At 5.42 pm, the ferry pulled away from the jetty. Isla watched it shrink into the grey water. Her phone showed one bar of battery and a message from Dad: “Still at the wharf?” She had meant to catch that ferry. Now the wind was pushing rain across the empty jetty, and the next boat was not due for an hour. Isla shoved her phone into her pocket and heard a clatter behind the ticket booth. A small dog stood there, soaked and shivering. A red lead trailed from its collar. Isla looked towards the road, then back at the dog. She found a name tag: “Biscuit — call Nan.” The phone screen went black. Isla took a breath. She ran towards the kiosk, hoping it was still open. The door was locked. She knocked anyway. A light flicked on inside. An older woman opened the door and stared at the dog. “Biscuit! I’ve been looking everywhere.” Isla smiled. Then she remembered the ferry. The rain came down harder.
Notice what works and what could improve
Use evidence from the draft in your answers. Feedback should describe an effect and, where useful, suggest a possible next step.
- The beginning is good.
- The exact time and the ferry leaving straight away create urgency; you could build on that tension in the next paragraph.
- I don't like ferries.
- Change the whole story so Isla catches the boat.
- The phone has one bar of battery.
- Rain blows across the empty jetty.
- The dog is called Biscuit.
- The next boat is due in an hour.
- Point out a detail that is effective
- Ask about something unclear
- Offer a possible change
- Suggest another possibility
- My question is…
- What if…
- I noticed…
- I wonder if you could try…
- The ending makes no sense. Fix it.
- You should add a huge storm and a new character.
- I wonder if you could show Isla’s reaction to remembering the ferry; it might make the final moment feel more complete.
- The ending is perfect, so don't change anything.
3 printable pages
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