Assertive Communication Skills

Name:

Date:

📚 Understanding Communication Styles

Assertive communication means expressing your thoughts, feelings, and boundaries clearly and respectfully while considering others' feelings. It protects your personal boundaries without being rude or aggressive.

The Assertive Script:

When you... + I feel/need... + Boundary (Please don't...) + Next step (If it continues, I will...)

1. Read each scenario below. Circle whether the response is Passive, Aggressive, or Assertive:

Scenario A: Your friend keeps sending you inappropriate photos in a group chat.
Response: "I guess it's okay... whatever you want to do."

Passive

Aggressive

Assertive

Scenario B: Someone pressures you to share a personal photo.
Response: "Stop being so annoying! You're such a creep!"

Passive

Aggressive

Assertive

Scenario C: Friends pressure you to join a risky online challenge.
Response: "I'm not comfortable with that challenge. Please don't pressure me to do it. If you keep asking, I'll leave the group chat."

Passive

Aggressive

Assertive

2. Tick all the signs of subtle coercion or pressure you might see in messages:

"Everyone else is doing it"

"If you don't, we won't be friends"

"You're being too sensitive"

"Just this once, it's no big deal"

"You owe me because..."

✏️ Practising Assertive Responses

3. Someone in your group chat says: "Come on, just send one photo. Don't be such a baby about it. Everyone thinks you're being weird."

Write an assertive response using the four-part script:

When you ________________________________

I feel/need ________________________________

Boundary (Please don't...) ________________________________

Next step (If it continues, I will...) ________________________________

4. Describe a situation where you found it difficult to be assertive. What made it challenging?

5. How can showing assertive communication demonstrate care and respect for both yourself and others? Think about Jesus' teaching to treat others with compassion and honesty.

6. Complete this sentence: "My respectful boundary response shows care by ________________________________"

7. What strategies can you use to pause and think before responding to pressure online or in person?

🎯 Personal Reflection

8. Rate your current communication style (circle one number):

Too Passive 1 ---- 2 ---- 3 ---- 4 ---- 5 Just Right ---- 6 ---- 7 ---- 8 ---- 9 ---- 10 Too Aggressive

9. Choose one area where you want to improve your assertive communication skills:

Setting boundaries with friends

Saying no to peer pressure

Speaking up when I disagree

Asking for help when I need it

Other: _________________

10. Write one specific goal for improving your assertive communication this week:

📝 Answer Key

Question 1 - Communication Style Identification:

Scenario A: Passive (The response shows avoidance and giving in without expressing boundaries)

Scenario B: Aggressive (The response uses name-calling and hostile language)

Scenario C: Assertive (The response clearly states feelings, sets boundaries, and explains consequences)

Question 2 - Signs of Coercion/Pressure:

All options should be ticked - these are all examples of manipulative language used to pressure someone.

Question 3 - Sample Assertive Response:

When you pressure me and call me names

I feel/need disrespected and I need you to respect my decision

Boundary Please don't ask me again or use name-calling

Next step If it continues, I will block you/leave the chat/talk to a trusted adult

Questions 4-10:

These are personal reflection questions with no single correct answer. Look for responses that show understanding of assertive communication principles, self-awareness, and practical application of the concepts learned.

Key Points to Look For:

• Understanding the difference between passive, aggressive, and assertive communication

• Ability to identify manipulation and pressure tactics

• Use of respectful but firm language in boundary-setting

• Recognition of personal communication patterns and areas for improvement

• Connection between assertive communication and showing care/respect for self and others